2017-03-10 Back to Reality

I’ve been thinking about this for days. Thinking and not writing. The road trip I took to Saint Louis feels like a million miles in the past now and it has been such a long week. When I got home, it was like switching gears so fast back to my regular world and so much needing to be done “right now” that I’ve barely had time to reflect on it let alone write about all the things I’ve been thinking and feeling this week.

When I was there, one of the things that was so nice was just having the dedicated time to myself to write. Even though I was still working, and exercising, and eating all the good food, just taking one or two things out of the daily routine gave me a little more time. Getting home so late Sunday (which was really early Monday) was rough and I wasn’t prepared.

Monday I had a doctor’s appointment I forgot about, so I had to, at the last minute, take that time off of work. I was also having a headache presumably from the sleep deprivation and just wanted to stay in bed and pretend I was still on my little vacation. It was also super nice out and there were things I wanted to get done in the yard that I had been putting off since last fall. I ended up taking the entire day off just to cope.

Tuesday, I had to face work again and it was also, of course, Zs bday, so that was the focus for that day.

Wednesday and Thursday were more normal days getting back to the regular routine, but still not enough time in the day to catch up on work or what I wanted to accomplish at home. I’ve had some strange ups and down’s emotionally and I can’t quite say there is some specific reason, just a wandering of my mind leading to either melancholy or happiness. Nothing captured in the moment, sadly.

Friday Z took a day off of school and I took another day off of work so we could spend the whole day together, just the two of us. I have this tradition that I do this with the kids around their birthday once a year. It’s really not often that I get one on one quality time with them because it’s usually the three of us together. This “free” day gives us a chance to just enjoy our time and they get to pick what we do so they look forward to it too.

Z and I had breakfast out at Village in and followed that up with a Movie and shopping for food and supplies for her friend birthday party this weekend. It turned out to be a really good day.

When I was in Saint Louis, I suspended my food tracking for the weekend and so Monday meant picking that back up again and facing the reality that I’m still not making any real changes to improve my diet. Vacations and road trips are special, and experiencing all the food from a new place is one of those things I really enjoy, and I’m not going to force myself to conform to a specific diet during those times. But choices I have made since I have been home have not been so great either, and I’m sure my stats for this week will be telling. Sometime this weekend I’m going to do some analysis and look at all that and really make a plan for the week ahead. I just have to find the time.

That’s the challenge, you know, finding time to do everything you want to do. This week I definitely felt like my writing was being neglected, but the other priorities were more demanding. Work, Kids, exercise, (and the Bachelor – haha). I’m not sure how to solve that. Perhaps it will never be solved. Maybe that’s just going to be the way that it is and the focus should be more about accepting it for what it is to be at peace with this reality. Is there any other choice? I just don’t know.

Back to Life,
Miss SugarCookie

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