2019-01-14 What Maintenance Mode Looks Like

A few days ago I wrapped up 2018 with a nice little post about my year. It was a great story… good characters, plot, and a nice amount of reflective detail to carry me into the next chapter of my life. It is not new information that writing is essential in my life. I write to process things I am experiencing. I write when things are rotten and it helps me through. I write to record and analyze my state of being. I write for enjoyment. My life is better on many levels because of it. That, of course, is not going to change. Just because things are good now, doesn’t mean the story is over. Nope.

What it does mean is that I can focus less on deep analysis into issues related to being a broken human being. Instead, I can focus more on living with intent and having a constant goal of maintaining a life that’s enriched by positive experiences. It’s continuing doing all the things I’ve already determined work for me while also exploring new avenues. It’s “Maintenance Mode” with a healthy dose of trying new things.

Like everything, I’m still thinking about exactly what that looks like and what I can do to set some goals and measure my progress along the way. In the last few years, the focus has been on my health and in a way, the “physical” aspects of this are fairly easy to quantify. As I slip into Maintenance Mode, that holds true.

For that reason, I’m going to start with the physical, measurable things. Sleep, BMI, Strength, and Heart Health. Notice I don’t say exercise. Exercise is an activity and though I can measure my steps each day, that’s just one factor of a larger picture. I can easily say my goal for 2019 is to average 12K steps a day, but just doing that doesn’t help define the objective. The objective now is maintaining a healthy BMI and both diet and exercise play into that.

Right now my BMI according to the calculator at livestrong.com is 20.94 which is well within the “normal” range. As long as I’m somewhere in that range (18.5 – 24.99), then things are good. I can set a goal for myself to get closer to 20 because I’d feel better being at the low end of normal and farther away from the cusp of the top of that range, and the main factor that plays into that is diet. I say this mostly because I’m already spending about as much time as I can per day on “exercise” and historically, my eating habits have had a greater impact on weight gain and loss than exercise.

If 20 even is the goal, then getting there means losing about 5 pounds. But in reality, I’m calling Maintenance Mode for a reason. If I lose that weight, then hooray, but if I don’t, that’s OK too. It’s just a measurement and objective to keep an eye on so that things don’t start going in the wrong direction.

Sleep is another easy one, which I have already come to a conclusion on. Though the amount of sleep necessary for body and mind recovery over the course of a day/night for an adult is about 7-9 hours, I always feel better when I am on the upper range of that scale. My average last year was 7 hours even and like BMI, I am OK with that too, but would like to see a slight improvement, say 7 hours and 15 or 30 minutes. The challenge here is time, and balancing sleep against a busy schedule. I have to be up by 7 (soon to be 6:15-6:30) so that means trying to get to be even earlier. I also struggle with being tired during the day and so that’s maybe an indicator that I need to get even more sleep. So while the conclusion and measuring this one is easy, follow through is not.

Of course sleep quality matters too and now that I have a FitBit that records my heart rate, I have statistics for the amount of deep, light, and REM sleep I am getting each night. It might be good to look beyond number of hours and start tracking deep sleep. Perhaps my goal should have more to do with the number of minutes in deep sleep. Actually, the stat in the app for one night is minutes, but the aggregate over time is an average. I’m currently at a 30 day average of 15% which is within the “benchmark” of 12-18%. Perhaps the goal is to get slightly higher than 15%? Worth considering.

Strength and endurance are heart health in general are also sort of all wrapped up together. I’ve done a little research in the last couple of days into what my FitBit records and calculates and they actually have a measurement called “Cardio Fitness” which is supposed to be akin to the VO2max, but not totally legit because to get a true VO2max you have to be on cardio eq with a breathing tube and push yourself to the point of exhaustion. I did that test in the athletic department on the UNO campus about a year and a half ago.

I have that paperwork somewhere, and it would be good to see how the FitBit calculation compares to that. In short though, FitBit is telling me my score is 42-46 which is “Excellent for women my age” (it says so right in the app). I guess since that is the case, I’ll just keep doing what I am doing, but would like to increase my free weights to 8lbs (where I left off last year when I quit Jazzercise). Like the other two categories, as long as I am doing about the same, I am doing pretty great.

I guess that is the point though right. I mean none of this is rocket science and it is exactly what I say it is. As I said in the beginning of this post, I sometimes just need to write it out so that there is more definition to it, so that it is solidified in my brain, and so there is some accountability for whatever it is – because it is written in a public forum which I can go back and reference. So that’s the physical side of the equation and I have started to think about the other factors, mental health and life satisfaction and enrichment but have not nailed down any concrete objectives yet. It’s certainly all connected though and a healthy body is essential for a healthy mind. More to come on that, I am sure.

For now I am out of time and need to get to work.
Ciao for now,
~Miss SugarCookie

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2019-01-12 A Year in Review – Farewell 2018

As predicted, I’m slow to take a good long, wide-net look at 2018. I’m just now starting to consider what is worth looking in the rear view for. Of course there are the easy and obvious things, like my measured stats.. steps, sleep, heart rate, weight, yadda-yadda, woof-woof. A big part of me is like Schmesh! Whatev.
I mean one doesn’t have to dig too deep to recognize this was one of the best years of my life, despite anything my stats might reveal. After all, I did fall in love and am now betrothed to the most wonderful, caring, thoughtful, loving person I’ve ever met. He just happens to also be crazy-mad in love with me, so that’s the bonus plan.
The only other thing I have to say about that is.. it’s about time the Universe came through for me in the relationship department. Not that life owes anybody anything and it is what you make of it. The best take away from this development in my life this year, is that we can’t really predict what will happen and we should cherish all that is good and not dwell on all that’s not.
That’s a pretty good lesson. As I carry my 45 years of life experience into the new year, I need to be mindful of it every day and grateful and generous when my cup runneth over.
Now would be a good time to execute the mic-drop and turn and walk off stage, but I haven’t even gotten to the part where I document and pontificate over everything else. For real though – This next bit is truly for posterity, and probably not worth anything to anyone but me. So selfish! 🤷‍♀️
Steps (and exercise)…
Average step count per day –
2016: 9294
2017: 14,992
2018: 13,717
My goal for 2019, believe it or not, is 12K per day. That’s because I want to focus more on strength and endurance. I don’t have great ways to measure that, but I want to start doing more free weights and Jazzercise again this year and so we’ll see what weights I can handle. I quit Jazzercise in June this year because of $$$ and time. I think I will be in a better position soon to start again soon. My FitBit does have an “exercise” view on the dashboard, and I’ve never really spent a lot of time looking at that. Perhaps there is something worth investigating, but who has time for that?! 😉
Sleep.. (average sleep per night)
2016: 6 hours and 49 minutes.
2017: 6 hours and 43 minutes.
2018: 7 hours and 0 minutes. 😎
My goal for 2019 is > 7 hours and 15 minutes. I’ve got this one totally figured out at this point. I have the formula for success, so it comes down to following that. Sleep is still the best litmus test for my overall mental health. If I’m not getting it, that’s a problem, and the effect of getting poor sleep bleeds into all the other aspects of my life. Yeah, so it’s important.
That’s pretty much where the “easy” data accounting stops. FitBit keeps track of other things, like my heart rate and monthly cycle and weight and daily exercise, but it does not look like there is much to report on for an entire “year”. I can report even without looking at the app anyway on a few of those things. For example, my weight went up over the course of the year by 5 to 10 pounds and I’d like to see that come back off in 2019 but that might not be the best thing for my mental health. My monthly cycle is pretty regular and I know even though I don’t record it that I don’t drink enough water each day.
What else is noteworthy? I’m still employed part-time (supposed to be 30 hours a week but even that seems to be a struggle). I finished my first year of a masters program and am now taking a break from that. As a consequence of both of these things, my bank account is suffering, but I’m not too worried about that since I am about to sell my house. I magically don’t have frequent headaches anymore (in truth I think this went away in 2017 when I quit my job AND started taking Curcumin instead of tylenol or ibuprofen).
In 2018 I went to Austin, Nashville, Key West, Nebraska City (twice), Boulder and Broomfield Colorado, and Cancun Mexico. I narrowly escaped having to go to Cali twice for work, which normally I would have been excited about, but now that I have a partner to travel with, traveling for work seems less appealing. Also thanks to Jim, I have several new shows (which I previously denounced TV completely), and I have forgotten how nice it is to just escape and relax that way every once and a while. I would highly recommend Colony, Maniac (Netflix), The Crown (we’re still in the 1st season), and the jury is still out on Pine Gap. We have only watched 1 episode so far, but it looks like a winner.
I can’t say I’ve ready any single book cover to cover (except for school stuff), but my hope is that in 2019 that will change too. I published my first poem, which is pretty exciting and has left me thinking I would like to do more of that. There might be a NYR (New Years Resolution NOT the New York Rangers) attached to that, which is a topic I will likely take on in the next week or so (just in time for the 2 year anniversary of this blog perhaps). Other goals will be addressed at that time as well.
I went to three music concerts – OAR, Fall Out Boy, and Twenty-one Pilots. I also had tix for Imagine Dragons and was seriously bummed that those conflicted with my Florida trip (because I was not paying enough attention to dates when the tickets were booked). I gave them to my darling daughter and she ended up taking her dad. How’s that for being the best ex-wife in the universe?
***
At the present moment, I am sitting with my laptop in front of a pretty good fire in my fireplace. I’ve literally been sorting and packing all damn day (except when I took a break to shovel the snow off of my driveway). After dinner I looked at my stacks of boxes and I feel pretty good about my progress but I also spied the giant bin of firewood in my family room. It would be silly to move such a thing, and I really could use that bin, so the fire made perfect sense. It’s been that kind of a day anyway, what with the snowfall and the quiet nature of the day.
It is kind of funny that in years past I have done a heavy amount of thinking and analysis about my year and what I should do more or less of. I’ve looked for clues to try and guide me in the future so I can be healthier, stronger, happier, and more satisfied with my life. This year, there is just not as much thinking to it. It feels like I have “arrived” in a number of ways and now I just need to do more of the same. Call it “maintenance mode”. Of course there will always be bumps, and just as my relationship status suddenly took a turn for the better this year, I’m very aware that something bad could happen. Sort of like what I was saying at the beginning of this post. The best we can do is enjoy each day as it comes, live in the present moment, and not take anything for granted. That seems to be echoing through my mind today, and should definitely play into whatever goals or resolutions I make for 2019.
I think that’s it for today (and for 2018). Peace and Love,
~Miss SugarCookie

 

2019-01-08 I’ll Get it Together, Just Not Today

This morning I’m back to my “home” routine, which I have not had for a week. No. For a week I’ve been in my alternate reality with a foot in a life I’m about to have. Not only did I not have my morning routine but it was also a “holiday” week which I took quite literally and used it as an excuse to NOT do work. All week my fear of being reprimanded for not getting my 20 hours in for my current contract was being overruled by my desire to attend lectures at the Residency my presence was not required at because I’m taking a semester off. Still that “work ethic” inspired worry lingers into this week and I make plans in my head to make it right this week by really beating down and get a ton accomplished on that front. Truth is, I probably just need to let it go.

Now that I’m here, back at my gym on my beloved elliptical machine, there’s no place I’d rather be. I’m thinking and writing and scheming about the future and that’s just what I need. In another month, I will be living in a different part of town and one might think this will put a serious damper on my morning gym time. It will and it won’t.

I’m still planning on driving the kids to school which is right across the street from the gym. So after I drop them I can still get my set in before getting back to the new house for whatever the rest of my days will hold. For a little while longer that will be work. After that, I’m going to spend a fair bit of time trying to “engineer definitions of love”, because that’s what poets do. Yeah, putting one foot in that reality and my soul aches to dive in. Total immersion like that time I went to the athletic department to get my true body fat measurement in a giant tank of water.

I got my vo2 max that day too and that’s pushing the heart and lungs, physically, to the point of total exhaustion. I’m planning to do that too, metaphoricaly with my words. It takes total dedication to the task and a focus and a drive that leaves no room for anything else. I could get on a soapbox about how multitasking kills productivity, but I won’t. I’ll just say that doing things well requires concentration and if your thoughts are split, then you are shortchanging something. Anyway, there are goals for 2019 in there somewhere, specifics and timing are pending.

As predicted I’m behind on evaluating 2018 and defining objectives for this year. I give myself slack in that regard in light of all my limbs being pulled in different directions. Feet over here and arms up in the air and head just smiling and nodding. I’ll get it together, just not today.

Speaking of New Years and goals I’m surprised to not see more people at the gym. I guess this time of day is still for regulars and the Surg of revolutionaries probably happens in the evening, after the typical work day is through. I’m glad I don’t come to the gym in the evenings anymore.

Doing a little “member” accounting from this time last year until now…

The man in black is still here on a regular basis though he’s not here today. He seems to have loosened a bit on his attachment to the treadmill at the end of the row and now runs on other machines (still in the back row though).

Bird-girl disappeared in March, or at least there have been no sightings of her in a long time. Perhaps she’s taking her fancy gym attire elsewhere it maybe she works out at a different time of day.

Two of three Steves are still here. One is my exes ex boss who is as reliable at the gym as a ticking clock. The other is UPS Steve who just today made a special trip across the gym just to say hi to me. That’s rare! BBQ Steve has been missing for several months now. He’s probably the most bold of the three in approaching me and starting a conversation. Of course none of that started until after I was dating Jim. Strange and amazing fact that I have been going to the gym for like 15 years and have rarely been approached by anyone, male or otherwise, and then this past year there have been several occurrences.

There are a handful of other people I recognize but don’t know their names. Yoga girl, three sets of couples of various ages – young, old, and older, and a father son duo that does side by side treadmill every day. Old is relative, by the way. I would consider myself between young and old so as I get older, the old people get older. That probably makes no sense.

About half the gym staff is static. The manager, Troy, now wearing glasses and most of the personal trainers never change. The front desk staff changes all the time. That’s what you get when you pay minimum wage for a job.

I’ve overstayed my welcome today, says the voice inside my head telling me I need to get to work. No rest for the wicked, or those who crave routine.

Later Gaterz, ❤️

~Miss SugarCookie

2018-12-31 Sneaky NYE (Spoiler Alert, it’s not really about NYE)

The lecture I went to yesterday was about image. It was about transcendence and turning abstraction into something the five senses can latch onto and understand. It was about time and all time occurring at once and at the same instant always slipping through our fingers. It was about our desires to live on in a persistent state.

These lectures always seem to hit a nerve. They create a central line right into my soul. How do they always know? How do they know what I’m thinking and what I need to hear? It’s a strange and wonderful thing I’ve come to accept. Yesterday was no exception. The ideas Liz was talking about are all things I struggle with – Time, image, and the temporary nature of.. everything.

Lately I’ve had a tough time with focusing my thoughts to write anything meaningful. It’s mostly random fluff and I’m just squeaking by on the notion that it will all come together and mean something at some point. I attended a lecture on braided narrative and sometimes I feel like that is what this blog is but the Heat hasn’t been applied yet so the tissues of the different braided strands of dough have not yet bonded with each other. I need some heat to trigger the rise. I don’t know what that might be yet, but when I see it I am sure I will know it.

Today the threads are these residency lectures, the conversations I had yesterday, the move, my kids, the end of a year, Jim, work, and the Red Cross blood drive at my gym today. Yada-yadda, which way to go from here?

***

Fast forward a few hours and I am back at home after an hour of cardio, an hour going through the blood donation process, two and a half hours to drive to NE City and back just for one lecture, and half an hour for a lukewarm shower. Now half my day is gone and the only conclusion that I have come to is that small, easy accomplishments can have a big impact.

Noteworthy is the fact that I forgot there was a blood drive today at my gym and so as I was just finishing up my set the gang was setting up their sign-in table. That was about 9AM. I went AMA and engaged the volunteer “sign-up person” asking if there were open spots. He said there were two “now” and I figured it would be my only chance today to squeeze in without an appointment. No telling how things would play out since I have a long, boring history attempting to donate blood and having my iron be too low. Today, things were on my side and I scored a solid 13 which is just above the threshold, so I was able to give. Huzzah!

And to think, all those times I took iron supplements for days and weeks and months and today I just waltz onto that bus and pull in a 13. The human body is strange and amazing and stupid. I must not have been anticipating a win because it put me well behind schedule for the rest of the day’s activities, which includes the driving and the lecture and work and dinner with Jim and my mom and sister and their SOs at the new house and *trying* to get my kids up and moving and off to their dad’s house. Did I mention I would also like to have time to read and write? Did I mention it is also New Years Eve?

That’s kind of a sneaky little detail lurking in the background. Normally I would be all about it – either all about embracing it for what it is, the end and the beginning, or actively and vehemently rejecting what it is – saying it is just another day and resolutions are soft attempts to change something about one’s self that they feel will make a difference. This year I’m very much in the middle of the road on it. Part of me wants to reflect and remember and revel in all 2018 has been, and part of me wants to get it done and over with so we can get back to all the awesomeness that life has become in the last year.

I lied earlier when I said work was on my mind and agenda for the day. I mean it is (or should be), but I’m not sure about it. It’s not a priority and I don’t really have the time. Can’t you feel how easy it is to let go of something when you don’t really care about it. That’s a problem. See what I mean about not being able to focus on one thing, somehow I started talking about donating blood today and ended up making some abstract statement about my motivation to work. Why is that and how can I stop doing it? And if I am going to keep doing it, why does it have to be so damn abstract? Grrrrr.

Anyway, satisfaction for me is in starting things and finishing things. If something can be done in 1 hour, start to finish, then that’s pretty motivational for me. I can donate blood in 1 hour and I feel great about both having done something good for someone and about how it didn’t really take very long. Another example would be writing this blog or doing my morning cardio. I look forward to it. I can start, and put in a little effort, and an hour later I feel great! The cardio is good as it is doing something good for my heart and my body and the writing is good because it is doing something for my mind. The posting is for posterity and there is icing on the cake if it is well received by someone else. Doing these things needs no convincing. They are easy as life should be and they are great habits to continue. I would not change anything about my morning routine now, except for perhaps trying to make it last a little longer – both the cardio and the writing. Soon I will be able to do that. I would not call it a NYE resolution so much as I would say it is a promise to myself and a gift made possible by my love.

I really need to wrap now and try and focus on getting something else done. The reading and more writing will have to wait a little while longer as my other duties and responsibilities are impatiently waiting. Life is good. Let’s go.

Cheers to New Years – and all the beautiful unwritten music ahead,
~Miss SugarCookie

2018-12-28 Tennis Anyone?

Not me.. not for a while anyway. Not only is it dreadful outside – and will be for too many more months, but my aging body has decided to throw me a nasty curve ball. Tennis elbow. 🎾

I’m actually not sure when it started or what thing I did that would have caused it. I have suspicion it was a fool thing I did a while back, working out in my basement, but I didn’t feel it right away. Instead, I had slight discomfort in my arm for several weeks which was not so bad that I could not just ignore it. That is, until I could not ignore it anymore.

Two weeks ago I remarked to Jim that it was getting worse and not better and that’s when I had explained my symptoms and pain and got a first diagnosis. The prescribed course of action was to treat with a healthy dose of anti-inflammatory, which I did for a week. I seriously loaded myself up with ibuprofen and after a few days it felt as though it was getting better, and then it got worse instead.

It became so troublesome that it started interrupting my sleep and now I have pain doing even the smallest tasks. I quit taking ibuprofen because it wasn’t helping and I was worried what that heavy a dose was doing for me. Now I’m doing the “ice and rest” thing. I’m not sure that’s helping either.

The truth is, it’s tough to “rest” it when you use your arm for so much. I have pain in the classic “tennis elbow” location and now at times it radiates into my forearm. When I lift even the smallest thing or twist my arm to open a door I get a throbing pain that shoots through my arm. No bueno.

Now I am acutely aware of everything that I’m doing and every time my arm is engaged. It’s a lot! The worst part is that I have no idea what I can do to make it better. Jim consulted with a few folks and I’ve done some research and what I am doing now, plus some specific physical therapy exercises is about all I can do. If it persists and does not start to improve, I can go see a doc and get some steroid shot or something but I don’t wanna. I really, really don’t want another f*ing doctor bill. What a pain.. literally.

According to the internet it can take weeks or months to heal, perhaps even a year. The thought of that makes me feel even worse. 🙄 All I can say is that it better be better by the time tennis season rolls around again. 🎾

Looking out the window today and seeing the snow I know it’s going to be a while. Still it’s tough to sit still.

Balls,

~Miss SugarCookie

2018-07-25 Look Who’s Back, Back Again

I’m at the gym on my elliptical machine. It’s the first time I’m about two weeks and just getting started all I can think about is the start of that Eminem song “Without Me”. Now there’s a master poet! That guy is brilliant. Perhaps troubled, but I think a lot of genius artists are. I was never a huge “fan” but enough of one to have made some music purchases and have that deliciousness in the shuffle rotation of my master playlist.

Hell, I even made Eminem the target subject of one of my critical essays last semester. A perfect example of an artist who made a name (and persona) literally, with his work. At this point, as I get rolling with this term and my first deadline less than a month away, I’m wondering how the heck I’m going to top those essays. The good news is that it’s not a requirement and having a different mentor who doesn’t have access to those essays. She might have the final, not sure, but that’s it. I have a feeling she’s also going to be a very different as a mentor than the person I had last semester and that will be good. Because diversity is good. At any rate, I’m looking forward to it despite the deadlines and all that.

I think that’s why my transition back to “normal” life has been such a challenge. I want to dive right in and get started but I missed 10 days of work which equates to about 50 hours and I have to, need to, do work to cover my bills. Monday was tough and yesterday was even tougher. All of a sudden I’m now on 4 projects instead of 1 and at least one of those I’ve been tasked with doing something I’m going to have to completely learn before I can do it. There are deadlines and my work mentor is busier than I am. Getting half an hour of time is a serious challenge. That’s a problem. Yesterday I was freaking out about it. Today I have to get my shit together and just focus.

Talking to Jim last night was a huge help. I unloaded and he listened and then offered good advice. It was advice I would give myself if I had my head screwed on straight. He’s the best.

Right now I’m 37 minutes into my cardio set and Jason MRAZ just came up in the shuffle with one of my favorites, “No Doubling Back”. If I was in my car, I would be singing out loud.. loud! I don’t think my fellow gym goers would appreciate my singing, so I’ll just keep on typing.

When I got home from Residency, I made a to-do list for personal things which need to be taken care of and looking at that yesterday and seeing all I have done so far this week also made me feel better. I keep adding things to it, so it has grown more than it has shrunk, but seeing checks in the boxes is satisfying.

Tonight, after what I’m sure will be a super successful day “at the office”, I’m going to feed the creative side a little more by going to a reading downtown. Two People I know will be there so that’s a plus going in. Perhaps I will even get inspiration for my first critical essay. That would be amazing.

And just now my morning meeting was cancelled so I can just keep rolling. I’ve really missed my morning cardio and I can’t ever really catch up on steps but I can take this opportunity to hit it harder today. I’m going to be upping the resistance and letting the tunes in my ear carry me away.

What would I do Without This?

~Miss SugarCookie

2018-06-03 A Sunday with Significance

But first.. weekly stats! The top areas of focus this week were sleep and work so I’ll start there.

Sleep.. 7 hours and 12 mites average sleep per night. Score! That’s 12 minutes above goal and I only missed hitting that two of 7 nights. Next stop – 7 and a half. It’s all about baby steps though, and not being too unrealistic. This week I’ll be with My sweetheart and that means I’m liable to get less sleep. I should set an overall long term goal to be to average out to 7 hours a night. My Fitbit supports calculating averages for a week, month, three months, and for the year. Interesting that I’m already really close to the 7 hour mark for this year (6 hours and 57 minutes) so maybe I should shoot for 7.5 instead. 🤔

Work.. The last two weeks have been great. This past week I clocked my new minimum of 30 hours. It’s my new minimum because now I have to foot the bill for the kids’ health insurance which got dropped when my ex quit his job in April. It’s an extra 600 bucks a month. Gross! Interesting side note, he’s just this week quit yet another job. Supposedly he has another lined up AND is saying he’s putting the kids on the new company plan. I’ll believe it when I see it cuz i just can’t trust anything really unless there’s proof. I. Short.. I’ve got to maintain at least 30 hours to stay qualified for my company plan. And those extra hours will not yield a higher paycheck because the cost of the insurance will be more than the extra I’m making. 🙄

Now for the best of the rest..

Exercise. Average 11k steps and zero Jazzercise classes. That’s right, a big fat goose egg for the exercise classes. I also happened to do my monthly pulse check on finances yesterday and those classes cost me 60 bucks a month. As a consequence, and figuring the low class participation is a trend that’s going to continue all summer, I went ahead and cancelled my membership. WHAT??! 😮 Words I never dreamed I would write, but I’m realistic and if I’m not getting out of it what I put in 💲💲💲, it’s not worth it. The dollar rules a lot of life decisions, this is no exception. 🤑

I’m going to take a break for at least as long as I need to in order to take advantage of the bonus plan. Which are deals they offer former customers to return like 1 whole year for 399. That would basically cut my cost in half. That’s a sweet deal. In the mean time, I’ll be doing more outside and can pick up some classes at the gym to compensate, when I have time.

In other news, my diet/eating still needs to be reined in. I weigh more now than I have for like 10 years. I know exercise is not my problem… I know it’s food and potentials changes in my metabolism. Getting old sucks. The most ducked up part of all of it is this trend started when I did that insane Whole 30 diet with my sister in January. I didn’t loose any weight those 30 days and have been steady climbing ever since. I’ve gained about 10 lbs, which doesn’t sound like a lot but for me it is.

It’s bothered me so much I’ve considered going back on the Whole Foods diet just to see if it has any affect doing a second round. I’ve also considered going gluten free again. If I do either of these two things, it will be a good test of how JS handles me having food restrictions. Matt never took that well and was not supportive. It always bugged me the way he would roll his eyes about that stuff. Whatever.

Actually part of my weight gain could be a result of being in a new relationship and happy and just enjoying indulging in all the wonderful things in life together. Yeah, we work out together but we also eat together and having someone else cooking and serving me means I haven’t been choosing my own portion size. That’s gonna change this week.

Which brings me to why today is significant. Today is our 3 month Anniversary AND later today we are having a Meetup at his house where our kids will meet for the first time. Yowza! I’m trying not to think about it too much. I mean, they are all teenagers and I’m sure it will be fine. But I can’t help but have some anxiety thinking about it.

It’s going to be a fantastic Sunday! It’s beautiful out, the birds are singing, and everything is going my way. I’m so fortunate and I know it. This June is going to be busy and just balls-out amazing with the trips planned. Cheers to a great start to it all.

Rolling Into Sunday Sumner Fun,

~Miss SugarCookie

PS. If you tuned in to see how last nights cliffhanger turned out, all I have to say about it is that Sleep took over and after I posted I never even got back out of bed. (So lame! 😜)