2017-08-13 Today is Mine

When I woke this morning at 7:33 after about 7 hours of sleep I said to myself, “Today is going to be my day”. I said it in a nice way, like I was going to hug the day and enjoy every minute of it’s time. Not in a mean sort of ownership way.

I’m rolling into a phase here where I intend to take my time and enjoy it and really do things I want to do. If that means I eat some ice cream and take a nap, then that is what it means. If it means I go on a 40 mile bike ride, then hooray for that. I’m going to try to not worry about the small things and appreciate all the wonderful parts of my life and the world around me.

So here now, after most of the day has come and gone, is “My Sunday” Status Update…

Jazzercise at 8:30 with one of my favorite instructors was a success. It was a great start to the day. When it was over at 9:30 though, I was done and left to go back home.

I spent about a half an hour putzing on the internets and completed my Red Cross “Rapid Pass” for the third time in two weeks. I have not needed it due to the low iron, but as I got in my car to drive to today’s location I said to myself again “Today is going to be my day”. Low and behold, my hemoglobin was 13.6 and so I was allowed to donate. Yes!! Great success.

After that I did a few random chores around the house and changed to go meet my sister downtown for Sushi. We went to Hiro 88 which I have not been to for sometime and it was awesome. I did not feel bad for ordering and eating the crab rangoon or some of each of the five rolls we selected or drinking two most delicious purple kimono drinks.

When I arrived back home I was really full and feeling very much like a nap would be a great idea but when I laid down, Josh texted and wanted to go for a walk. So I opted to get the steps instead. We went to Walnut which is about an hour walk and toward the end of it we both remarked that the trail is getting kind of boring. It really is. He also was lamenting about being hungry so we drove to Qdoba where he had a quesadilla and I had chips and queso. I knew I had overdone it when my stomach started to hurt. Too much goodness in one day.

That brings us to right about now. 7PM and the sun is starting to get low in the sky. I’ve had good conversations, good food, 15K steps, and am really ready for my kids to return home tonight. Today was my day. Tomorrow will be ours together.

Hasta Manana,
~Miss SugarCookie

2017-07-23 Sunday Status Update – The Bumble Edition

I stopped doing normal Sunday status updates because, well, the sleep still goes up and down, the exercise is pretty consistent, and there is nothing noteworthy about my dietary intake. I mean, how boring can one life be anyway? So today instead I’ll be reporting live from the front line of the dating war.

I would not call it a war if it felt like a pleasant rewarding experience at all. So far it has been so less than stellar.

I’ve updated my profile and pictures and bio no less than a dozen times and feel I have everything just the way I want it.

I’ve swiped left (left is thumbs down) on many, many dozens of peoples pictures. Sometimes it is because of their bio but most times it is their pictures.

I’ve also swiped right quite a bit. Perhaps up to 60 or 70. I’ve swiped so much I ran out of people to look at. Three times I have adjusted my target age range and distance to include more people and that was fun, because looking at profiles is mildly entertaining. I have since narrowed the distance because I am not really intending to date someone from Lincoln. It’s just too far.

Of those people, I have “matched” on about 40 people. That means they swiped right on me too. Hooray for my self-esteem.

With this Bumble app, once you match the girl has to initiate the conversation which means, I had to reach out and at the very least say “hi” via “text” to those people I matched on. Once you match you have like 24 hours to do that and if you don’t the match expires and you no longer have that opportunity. I’ve let about 5-10 matches expire without saying hello. Which means, I’ve initiated around 30 to 35 conversations.

My opener has been everything from a very generic “hello, how are you” to something I felt was witty based on their picture or profile. At first it kind of freaked me out saying something to a complete stranger, but then after a while I’ve learned not to take anything to seriously. As a general rule, if you are yourself and they like you, then yay for that. So I’m just being genuine.

After the conversation has been initiated, they have 24 hours to respond, and of those 30-35 people, all but about 3 or 4 responded in some way. This means that I have had back and forth text at least once with about 30 people.

I find it amazing how many people have just let the conversation drop after that initial exchange. I’m questioning what peoples motives are. I mean, why would you “get that far” and not at least ask a question or something? So strange. I’m more of the mindset that if someone texts me, I will just text them back, because there is no harm or foul in that communication. Some people have asked questions, and maybe decided they did not like my responses and that’s OK. Some people I’ve asked questions of and did not like their responses and that’s OK too. Those conversations just dried up quickly, but at least there was some reason or thought behind it.

So those are the preliminary stats. Now for the more meaningful stats…
Six first dates, one second date, and at the present moment only one person I would probably consider a relationship with.

Date 1: Sunday Sushi Lunch. Did not look like his picture and was not really my type.

Date 2: Weekday working lunch. Did not look like his picture and was not really my type.

Date 3 (Originally Mr. Fireworks, now just a dud): My type and the first date went really good (see the post on July 2nd for details). Good enough for a second date but after the second date he was not so into me and stopped communicating. I figured I’m not his type.

Date 4: Met in the park after work to chat, drink a beer, and play frisbee. This guy was cute and kind of my type but his personality really rubbed me the wrong way. He was a little too ADHD and kind of bossy and presumptuous or something. He texted me about 5 minutes after we parted ways and wanted to inquire about dating exclusively. Once I said no to that, he never responded again.

Date 5: Nice guy, good looking and kind of my type. Dinner went great (he was the first guy since Date 1 to actually pay for anything for me). The conversation was good/easy. In the end I was probably not in the right frame of mind or something. Afterward, I went to watch what was left of the sunset at Walnut Creek and sat there listening to music and crying. The evening made me think about Matt for some reason. How we met and how he was so into me and how I was so into him from the start. I want to feel that way about somebody and this just wasn’t it. I tried to picture myself with this person on a vacation or sitting at home making dinner or something and I just couldn’t. The whole thing just made me feel like dog-doo.

Date 6 (today): We met for coffee in Benson and I got the time wrong and was like half an hour late. So out of character for me. He was handsome and fit and wonderful to talk to. I really could have stayed for much longer chatting but he had to get back home. We exchanged numbers and he did respond to the text I sent him after so I hope that is a good sign. I felt much more positive after the time we spent together than my date last night, but I don’t want to be too hopeful or seem too desperate so I’m just going to let him reach out to me again. If he does, that’s great. If not, well that will be another blow to my ego.

After all this, I have done some analysis (of course) and come to a few very important conclusions.

– I really am in this for finding a partner for the long term. I’m not built for casual dating or seeing multiple people. I can’t help but think strategically about the big picture and really want to find that right person so we can build a life together.
– I really, really want someone who wants me. I need someone to pursue me and not be wishy-washy. I need someone who is a good communicator and is responsive. I sort of knew these things before, but my experience with this so far has solidified these truths in my mind. I may be easy-going, but I very much need certain things and those are absolutes.
– I have a type. There is a look, or look+personality that I am drawn to and a few of these guys are fine people, nice people, hard workers, good citizens, but just not my type. I’m learning what that is and also how to politely tell someone that they are not my type. Telling someone something they don’t want to hear is a good skill to have, I suppose.

I’m a little disappointed in bumble in general and unless some of those conversations spark back up and someone actually asks me out on a date (5 of the 6 were initiated by me), then I’m just going to move the app off my home screen and not really look at it or do anymore swiping.

This has been a bit longer than I originally intended but I guess I had a lot to say about it. Tomorrow the kids come back and I have to admit with not feeling well and not accomplishing much this weekend I am not really ready.

Hopefully I will have a more restful sleep tonight, even if whatever this sickness I have continues to linger.

So Much for Sunday,
~Miss SugarCookie

2017-06-11 Sunday Stats and Things Like That

I’ve been so focussed on the big things and the big picture and big changes that I have not been keeping up on my day to day/week to week analysis. It’s really about time to start digging back into the details and when it comes to details, stats (and things like that) are where it’s at.

Have I written about balance? Yes
Have I written about everything being connected? Yes
Have I concluded that being healthy starts with sleeping well? Yes, lots of times. All of the validation I need is within these few important items…

Sleep: Last 7 days average 7 hours and 39 minutes. 39 minutes above my unofficial goal. 😃

Exercise: 7 day average step count is 18,150. That’s 6K over my official goal of 12K per day and 3 K over my unofficial daily goal. 😃

I’ve been to 3 or 4 Jazzercise classes this week as well as multiple workouts at the gym and several walks in various parts of town (hence the stellar step count). 😃

Eating: This is the one area I feel I’ve sort of failed on as Ive given in to lots of cravings and eaten out a bunch. The scale is up a few lbs. and I want to try and figure out how to make a plan and stick to it. Of all the things, I think this will be the biggest challenge ahead of me.

For today though, I want to celebrate this success. Deep down in my heart I feel like I can attribute my sleeping better to the huge weight that has been lifted off me. I also feel like the fact that I am beginning to “let go” has given be back a little more time to focus on exercise, even though I’m not really done yet.

That celebration starts with enjoying the rest of my weekend. Monday will be here soon, so I am going to go now, and squeeze as much funday out of the rest of this Sunday as I can.

~Miss SugarCookie

2017-04-29 Saturday Status Check

I thought I would start today by providing a simple status check, just so it is perfectly clear what the last week has done to me.

Sleep: Last 7 days average 4 hours and 49 Minutes. About 2 hours short of my daily goal. 😔

Exercise: 7 day average step count is 9873. About 2K under my official daily goal and 5K under my unofficial daily goal. 😔

I also went to Zero Jazzersice classes. 😔

Eating: There were several lovely places I had the opportunity to eat at but not write about while I was in Phoenix. However, the majority of what I had was fast food. Fast food either at the hotel or hospital or drive through. I had very little fruit and no veggies. I often ate too much and felt overly full. I was eating early and late and sometimes not at all in the middle of the day. To top it off, I was being sustained a fair bit of time by highly caffeinated and sugared lattes. 😔

Some of this was my choice and some was not, but a girl’s got to do what a girl’s got to do.

I stepped on the scale this morning, and weigh the same as I did the day that I left. So I’m not super upset about the food thing or the exercise thing, but I definitely FEEL icky and need to make sure I start the week (starting with the weekend) off right. Now is the time to turn those frowns upside down.

On that note, I’m going to go unpack my bag and see if I have anything clean in my closet to wear to Jazzersize.

Time to Smile 😃
~Miss SugarCookie

2017-04-05 Random Hump-Day Update

This morning I feel pretty good about life in general. I’m well rested and ready for a highly productive work day. I fully intend to get a lot done today and am also looking forward to a sister-date I have scheduled tonight with my lovely sister Jamie. I’ve got a lot to catch her up on and I’m sure she has some good-goodies for me too.

Since I don’t have a lot to write about this morning, how about a random weekly update:

Last night I had 7 hours and 26 minutes.
So far this week my average is 6 hours and 25 minutes.
I’m doing a little better with this balancing act and have not had an “Under 4 hours” night screwing up my average.. yet.

Exercise (according to FitBit)..
Yesterday I had 17,655 steps.
My average in the last 7 days is 16,503.
I had my best recorded day ever last Sunday 4/2 at 26,775.
No Jazzercise since last Sunday. Just not enough time in the day to fit it in this week with work and kids stuff.

Not tracking my food anymore and slowly trying to just substitute healthy choices for not so healthy choices. Sometimes “slowly” means not at all. 😉

That’s it for now, time to get to work.
~Miss SugarCookie

2017-03-26 Sunday Stats + Choices

It’s been a while since I posted stats. So long, that I forgot what I was keeping track of. I’ve put a pause on tracking my food so I have nothing to report on for that. Feeling a bit setback the past 3 weeks, I’ve put more of a focus on sleep and exercise.

My step goal is 12,000 steps a day.
Today I scored 18,603 (so far). 😃
My average for the past 7 days is 12,936. 😃
My average for the past 28 days is 12,910. 😃

For sleep my goal is now 7 – 8 hours a night.
Last night I got 6 hours and 24 minutes.
My average last week was 6 hours and 57 minutes (so so close).
I had 5 days in the last week that were over 7 hours. 😃
I had 1 day in the last week that was over 8 (Magical!). 😃

All these stats are courtesy of my trusty FitBit.

I also cut caffeine a few weeks back and I’ve done a good job of sticking to that. I have had some chocolate which has some measure of caffeine in it and decaf espresso which I think does too.

Right I’m sitting in my bed listening to Phil Collins and Genesis. I’ve had a glass of wine, the first in many weeks, and thinking about my day, my weekend, and my life.

This reminds me of when I was in high school (minus the wine of course). Genesis and Phil were at the top of my charts and I spent many nights spinning those CDs from the boombox I kept on my bed. It had red and green lights for power and base boost and I remember sitting with my notebook and pen and writing and eventually turning out the lights. I would lay in the darkness and let the sound of the music lull me and eventually those lights got blurry and faded into black as I slipped into dreamland.

Not so different now. It’s a laptop instead of a notebook and an iPhone instead of a boombox, but the lights and the music are the same. And I’m still contemplating the meaning of life. I’m still thinking about what choices I have to make.

I could choose to be upset with myself for all the things I did not get done this past weekend, or I can choose to be happy with all of the things I did.

I can look to the past and regret the choices that I have made or I can see all the wonderful things about my life and recognize that it would not be possible without those choices. Everything I have done has lead me to now.

I can look into the future and fret about the choices I still have in front of me. There is a lot of uncertainty and there is risk. In that, there is also fear. Yes, I am afraid of wrong choices, but back it up a couple of sentences and see… It does not matter what I choose as that will lead me to tomorrow and it will be what it will be. I will still be me and life will go on.

I Choose This,
Miss SugarCookie

2017-02-19 Sushi Sunday + Stats

It’s Sushi Sunday again and I had a little of this and a little of that at the Dragon Cafe. I always order too much so that I have some left over for lunches during the week. I went with my friend Josh today who gets all you can eat and so he’s not allowed to take leftovers. I *may* have snuck a few of his fancy rolls onto my plate. Such a rule breaker. 😉

As for my weekly stats…
Last Night: 5 hours and 33 minutes. I blame the margaritas.
Average for the past week: 7 hours 11 minutes. Slightly better but not good enough. I did not count the one night this week that I clocked 0 hours of sleep. So it was the average of 6 nights.
Goal: 8 hours.

Today: Jazzercise – 1 hour. Walk – 1 hours. Tennis 2 hours.
21K+ steps.
Average steps for the week: 17,944 I guess I’ve been in beast mode lately.
My knees both hurt and I think tomorrow is going to have to be a total recovery day.

Today Total Calories under daily goal: 340
Today Net Calories under daily goal: 2,200
Total Calories over goal for the week: 2472
Net Calories under goal for the week: 4157
The net under factors in exercise and so that much under and I should see some results. But my weight change is not affected by this.. yet. It could be that I am also adding muscle at the same time.

Sugar is down this week and therefore carbs are down and fat and protein are up.
Carb 48% of diet.
Fat 37% of diet.
Protein 15% of diet. I’d like to get this up to 20% to help build that muscle. The more muscle I have the more I can eat.

I Broke the seal last night and had some drinks. I was invited to a party and margaritas were the reason for the party so I could not turn that down. It was a bunch of people I never met before and my friend Leah who invited me to tag along with her. It was fun and entertaining. Lots of bold personalities and I was able to blend in with the kitchen appliances and just listen to the conversation. There were some great stories and at one point I was laughing so hard that my abs hurt. Life is good.

Relationship Status: Single and survived Valentines week. It’s like a distant memory to me already.